The Bill Simmons Game

You may remember this post where I called out Bill Simmons for his nicknaming Kevin Durant. As a follow-up, let’s play a little game.

10 of these things were “analyzed” by Bill Simmons in this column about Kevin Durant and Greg Oden. The other 10 were not. Pick the 10 that you think are his.

1. Name: won by Durant
2. WOW Factor: Durant
3. Whammy! Factor: Durant
4. Unintentional Comedy: Oden
5. YouTube Clips: Durant
6. Intentional Comedy: Oden
7. Video Game Potential: Durant
8. Defense Repertoire: Oden
9. Clutch: Oden
10. Pantheon Potential: Durant
11. Vegas Factor: Durant
12. Impression made at NBA workouts: Oden
13. Fantasy Potential: Durant
14. Internet Presence: Even
15. Best “Skills”: Durant
16. Marketability: Durant
17. Stomach Punch Potential: Oden
18. Style/Swagger: Durant
19. Tremendous Upside Potential: Durant
20. Tremendous Downside Potential: Oden

The scoring grid

0-3 correct: This is actually hard to do, even if you just guessed. But you’ve probably never read Bill Simmons.
4-6 correct: You are reading the right amount of Bill Simmons, do not read any more. Keep skimming those 6,000 word mailbags.
7-9 correct: You are dangerously close to reading too much Bill Simmons.
10 correct: You imagine yourself chilling with Bill, J-Bug and Hench, and you probably named your dog “The Dooze 2”. Just stop.

I made up 3, 5, 7, 9, 10, 11, 13, 15, 17, 18

If you think those categories are useless (yeah I know, he’s just having fun), check out the ones he used a while back to compare David Ortiz and Larry Bird (middle of page).